Choosing to See


Learn about the “Our Children at Risk Brochure”

Heavier reading than many websites, yet more user-friendly than a scientific journal, this site asks of you skill-sets that the gurus tell me few people have. This includes a willingness to examine your own belief systems even as you examine mine, as well as unlearning the propaganda of a complicit media, education system, and cultural system. They’ve been in our heads for decades. The pro’s tell me I’m asking too much. I think they’re wrong.

When you start to realize just how far-reaching the flow-on effect is of redefining marriage, and if you care about children, freedom and/or culture, you will find yourself actively getting involved.

I find it easy to be intimate and personal about this stuff. It is both my story and possibly all of our stories. I have enough tertiary, professional training and life experience to bring information with a measure of credibility and authority, however I can’t convince you of any of this because I recognize that as a web persona I could lie or be fraudulent. Lots of lies get sold online, so I welcome your skepticism.

Skepticism and caution encourages me. Genuine skeptics are usually willing to dig a little deeper and even place their own beliefs under examination. I invite you and welcome you.

The Choice We Make

Mine is a voice crying out in alarm – but as one running through a burning building, arms flaying and voice shrieking. No, this is a calm but urgent call. My voice is also reasoned and tempered by the compassion I feel for the very people I oppose in principle.

In case you missed it, I am still same-sex attracted myself. My compassion is real. However, I understand tolerance in truth does not mean endorsement.

Honesty can’t please everybody, nor can the choices we must make. If you do not become involved the choices will be made for you.

See the Battle

Changing the definition of marriage has become an article of war, yet most people still don’t realize it [*1]. Should marriage be redefined to accommodate homosexuality? It is not an issue for flippancy. Its impacts are deeply profound.

Why has the fight to date been ruthless and why have many sacrificed so willingly? The answer is because a great deal is at stake! Activists and lobbyists on all sides of the debate have fought hard. They have expended thousands of hours of energy and there has been millions of dollars spent. Does it make you wonder why?

When you consider the lengths gone to, do the bells start ringing? Do the lights come on? This must be important!

It isn’t just in Australia either. Interestingly, in every country where the people (not the politicians) made the decision, marriage remained unchanged. As a result, homosexual activists prefer to work through politicians or the judiciary. Only politicians and judges have allowed the keys to culture to be handed over; a properly informed population never has! [*2]

In countries that have resisted the push, open and informed discussion has been allowed. That is not the case in Australia. Where honesty is allowed, bullying, put-downs, dishonesty and emotional ploys are seen for what they are – vehicles of control and deception (See articles on the Federal Mock-Inquiry, deliberately flawed surveys and the St. James (Un)Ethics Centre debate. All have been disgusting displays of the manipulation and deceit that will be used by those who militantly push for these changes.

So in the interests of being informed, and helping you to inform others I want to help you understand what so many want to know: “What’s the fuss all about?”.

See with Compassion

It has been said that truth is the first casualty of war. I suspect love is the second.

As a bi-sexual man who was exclusively gay as a youth, I love and want to support gay people. However, for extremely good reasons, I cannot support a change to the definition of marriage. I love the people, but I oppose the cause. I empathize fully because I have walked in their shoes – still do – but this is flat out wrong!

Both truth and compassion compel me to protect the young before gratifying the elder.

It breaks my heart when I see young people harassed while their sexuality is in process. Most gay adults seem to carry these wounds of youth either buried deep and denied, or alternatively smeared as angry war paint all over their exterior. There are a few exceptions, but most have significant wounds. Compassion is valid and required!

If you haven’t given this thought before, please invest a few minutes and imagine what it is like, especially for a young person. It is not easy:


  • Being rejected for emotional attractions that feel natural and beyond your control.
  • Being hated for something that (mistakenly) feels like the centrality your identity.
  • To think differently if you do allow your sexuality to define your identity.
  • When the journey into ‘the gay lifestyle’ encourages sexual actions of a type that – without adult encouragement or pornography – you would never have even imagined.


It is very understandable why many become disillusioned, confused and militant. There are good reasons why I once stood in arrogance and anger on the other side of the fence!

But compassion isn’t not enough.

See Beyond Self

We who share minority sexualities and eroticisms need a head-check. Like everyone else, we need to realize the world does not revolve around us, nor does it owe us:

    • There are many who suffer in our culture
    • Life is unfair to everyone, just in different ways.
    • Pain avoidance is a natural goal, but not always a wise or noble one.

Our world is littered with the carnage visited upon others who ‘were true to themselves’ and ‘did what they felt right’. Too often, this damage was caused by cowardly, self-absorbed or convenient choices by otherwise decent people. It is easy to choose comfort, or to avoid tough decisions.

In time however, the ‘easy option’ rarely proves to have been the best one!

Search for Wisdom

Our compassion needs to be guided by wisdom and love.

Wisdom and love belong together. You can make either one look good on its own, all dressed up in the ideology of the day, but without its complementary partner. It is either muscle without bone or bone without muscle. Where there is no understanding of heart issues you will not find wisdom.

With that in mind, be particularly aware of the following:

  • This has been the most deceptive cultural and political battle I can remember witnessing. But even as I recognize this, I recognize my own potential for self-deception. Maybe they are genuinely deceived, but they are still dangerous!
  • The general public has been duped by often heard lies – and who can blame them – especially when the lie helps us avoid pain or self-examination. The most significant of these is labeled “Born this way”. The second most significant is “Homosexuality is a choice”. Both sides want their lie to be true, but they are both deceptive simplifications designed to convey a compelling but incomplete message. The truth lies somewhere in-between.
  • The population is either sadly largely uninterested or unaware. Consequently, complex issues have to be conveyed in 4 second sound bites. That isn’t easy.

Only Children Think a World Without Pain is Possible

For children, when someone doesn’t give you something, it means they don’t love you. But then we grow up. Moving from childhood to adulthood, we learn that “No” is sometimes a very loving response. This issue needs responsible and loving adults. This site is for responsible adults.

In Your Service and Your Defense
A Sensible Man

Created 12.8.12. Shortened and revised 27.12.12.



  1. Now, 5 years later, it is good to see more are aware.
  2. This statement still stands (I believe). The media obstructionism and misinformation greatly biased those who voted in Ireland. Here too in Australia, the same forces have aligned against reasonable attempts to inform the public.



This Project is Closed. The Battle Continues Elsewhere.

Same-sex marriage damages familiesPS: We’re Scaling Back Efforts Here. The Battle Continues Elsewhere.

Those who want truth look for it; sadly, most do not want it. As somebody who is reading these words, you are certainly in a minority. Congratulations!

After weeks of doing what we can as amateurs and volunteers, the decision has been made to reduce our efforts here, though the fight still continues.

There are other websites doing similar things, and to be honest, probably doing it better. Please check out our Links page to find additional resources.

We are not surrendering. We are redeploying our energies in this very important cultural battle. We hope what is here is of benefit to you, and we encourage and pray that you will continue to seek truth, and to make truth known. If this battle is lost, what has happened elsewhere will certainly happen here.

Prepare yourself and humble yourself before God who models the sacrifical love and commitment to truth our society so tragically lacks. We all are laden with personal weakness, and cumulatively as a society, we also feel the pain. The challenges of the future will be more intense than the challenges of this day.

We’ve worked hard to keep the Lord out of the content of these pages as we live in a world where everything must be tolerated (read ‘endorsed’) except Him.

Truth is, He’s been woven into everything presented here, because love always includes truth – and that is who He is. Whatever the outcome of this SSM battle, as a team, we pray you find him!